Tuesday, April 30, 2013

Funk-y Town


2April30

I've found myself to be in a bit of a funk for the last few days. I think my funk is two fold. The first being that KC's deployment is starting to wind down, and the thoughts start to stir around in my mind. Thoughts that range from his safety as he travels to home, the concern that I have about the start of fighting season and how that might influence him and the others around him as they prepare to and as they actually leave. I wonder about when he does get back. Will things be weird and foreign? Spending over half a year away from the one you love is tough. With limited communication for that entire time period and then seeing that person face to face seems so strange. The thought of our first embrace, where I can hold his face in my hands, to know his touch again, is hard to imagine because the last time we did so was over two hundred days ago. My hope for his return is that we can fall right back where we left off when he deployed, but be that much more connected because we fared through such an uncertain time without so much as a hiccup in our relationship. I will continue to have that tug in the back of my mind though, the one that wonders what he's doing at that exact moment, until he is home with me and out of harms way. I cannot wait for the moment when we can both look back at our first deployment together and see how much we've grown as a couple. To look back at it and see how strong and even more independent it made me. To know that our relationship is Deployment Strong...It doesn't get much better than that :-)

As far as the other fold of my funk, that one isn't solved as easily, but I think it is in the process of mending. Friendships for me have always been pretty easy. Easy in the way that I don't have much, if any, conflict with my friends. We all just want to converse about reality tv, clothes, food, and other dumb stuff like that. We also talk about serious stuff too!  My friends and I are laid back, and that's how I like it. This world has enough crazy things going on everyday that a girl needs some respite from it all. Girlfriends are best for that. However, when a friend fails to see how certain actions taken affect the quality of her friendship with others, it causes the normalcy to go away while also causing a rift in the friendship. Not to be skimpy on the details, but it's a situation I'm currently experiencing. After spending a lot of time thinking up a plan of action, I've come to the conclusion that this is a situation where one has to experience and realize first hand the lesson, they cannot be told. It may take time for it to resolve itself, but I will be patient until it does happen.

3April30

It feels that after two days of being in Funk-y Town, I am finally emerging from it. Sitting on my balcony while the sun shines on my feet, and Feist streams through my earbuds has a way of making a girl feel good. Maybe it's because I'm a Seattleite. I think the only thing that would make this afternoon better would be a glass of wine, but it's early so there's still a possibility on that wine.

april30


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